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Ash I’m spiraling, descending down a cold, empty rabbit hole with no end in sight. I just keep falling with a heavy mind clouded in guilt and powdered happiness. It makes it more bearable, the memory of you. But I don’t want to remember you anymore. I don’t want that night to keep playing behind my eyes, the sound of your dying breath, the feeling of your cold, lifeless body in my arms. I want her, the cute neighbor I keep seeking more of, with a saint’s smile and sinner’s eyes. I need her joy and endless kindness. And she wants me too. But how can she have me when I still belong to you? Sage My mom used to warn me, don’t pick the broken ones. You can’t save them. Their splintered pieces are too sharp, and they’ll most certainly leave you with wounds that bleed for years on end. I’ve done a good job of listening to her. In all my twenty-two years, her advice has never failed. But Ashton Johnson is more than a broken man. He’s volatile, yet tender, unpredictable, with an unshakable devotion to those he cares for. Angry, but fiercely protective. But mostly, he’s sad, and so incredibly beautiful. I don’t want to save him. I just want to love him. But how do I do that when his mind is troubled, and his heart isn’t mine to have?