The Unidentified Funny Objects series delivers an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre’s top voices! In this volume you’ll find: * Overworked fairies distributing swords. * Alien yeti slackers * Elf bakers * Absconded books * Superhero dance battles * Matchmakers … in spaaace! This anthology contains the following stories: The Hero of Small Things by Amanda Saville Chai Noon by Esther Friesner If Pages Could Blush by Kyle A. Massa The Time Loop Device is Counting Down by Beth Goder Crouching Swan Hidden Polka by Jim C Hines Sgt. Yeti by Gini Koch The Great Beyond Commands by John Wiswell The Second Wish by James Beamon These Three Aliens Walk into a Bar by Simon R. Green Our Most Sincere Apologies to the People of Brazil by Jane Espenson Liability Insurance Policy for Immortals, Cryptids, and Other Magical Beings: Annual Newsletter by Tina Connolly The Shadchen of Venus by Lavie Tidhar Cory Sucks by Auston Habershaw Sunnyside Daycare Employees’ Chat Log, Post Alien Takeover by Amanda Helms Cooking Up Trouble by C. Flynt Right to Remain Silent by Jody Lynn Nye Auntie Elsie’s Compleat Guide to Heartbreak by Tim Pratt The Troll Bridge by Adam Gaylord Do Gumshoes Dream of Electric Sleep by Dave Vierling Hell’s Bureaucracy by David Hankins A Crisis of Fate by Zach Shephard